The Care and Styling of Beards: For Women Over 50.
My, my, my, how life changes over the age of 50. I thought I looked pretty good, maybe even younger than my age, until I took a closer look in the mirror, in the sun.
Take my advice, don’t do that.
Always look in the mirror under soft light. It’s much easier to like your reflection that way.
It seems that good lighting allows one to see all the hair that is growing out of one’s face, chin and neck. Hair growing out of my chin? Hair on my neck? What am I, a Chimp? And every once in a while a hair says “Let’s go wild and just grow on her cheek.” I can’t keep up with it.
My father used to tell me that eating burned toast would make hair grow on my chest. Well my brothers and I did eat the burned toast because we weren’t allowed to throw it away. We had to scrape off the burned surface and then eat it anyway. (That’s what happened to those of us who are the children of Depression-era children.) He did not say eating burned toast would cause a beard to grow, but here I am.
This hair thing has me stumped. I don’t know what to do about it. Do I keep removing it every week?
What if I don’t do anything? Will it spread? Will I eventually have hair growing out of my nose and ears? I have enough to maintain as it is. With all the time it takes to apply make-up, do my hair, and dress fashionably around this middle aged body, I can’t possibly add another beauty task.
So I’ve decided to let it grow. Then I’m going to try out for the Red Sox. Can’t hurt. Might help. Oh I can’t throw a ball, or hit one or even catch one. But I’ll have the most beautiful beard on the team. Go Sox.